Adam Turner, newest member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints!!!

Today was a wonderful day! My dear Friend Adam Turner finally got baptised! It was so amazing. Tears in everyone's eyes because we know that Adam has made the right choice and he waited for this day so long! I have been fortunate to have a few good friends in life and Kip Corry and Adam Turner are two of the best. Kip baptised Adam today and I thought the world of him for being one of the few young men i know who can do such a great work of God. Good for you Kip! He and i got baptised together and have been friends for a long time and i have to say seeing him in all white he looked the best i have ever seen him. I'm so proud of my boys! I have to say that today really opened so many eyes it was great to hear Bishop Ben speak, no matter how many people are in the room or what he is talking about he makes it feel like that is what you had to hear. That man i swear has a gift, he has saved me from lots of things and i have gone to him in my darkest moments and he still was a friend to me and helped me see the light. Today was a Wonderful day! I'm so proud of you Adam! The long wait is over and you are now pure and clean. I am so glad that you chose this. You will have a great life if you keep on this path and ya its extremely hard and no one is perfect but remember that no Latter day Saint is perfect, being a true Latter day Saint means giving it your best and trying to be more like Christ. We love you so much Adam, I'm extremely proud!You helped me realize somthing i needed to know. Congrats Adam!!

This dang paper makes my head spin!

I was assigned to write on my theory of love and my first or most true love. Not the best time to write this paper but hey. I wont put it on here but in doing my research i found out a few things and found some quotes that scare me because its like it came from my lips! if you read this and know me you will understand it and be just as freaked out

• I finally understood what true love meant.......love meant that you care for another persons happiness more than you're own, no matter how painful the choices you might face be.

ok well maybe its a bad idea to put them up here but gosh that one is sadly true. Funny how this stupid paper has made me think. I kinda dont like it because it brings up a lot of things that still hurt and ache. It brings back memories that seem as though they were only yesterday and it brings the person who has changed me forever. Funny how when your a little girl you dream of love and you think that every love story has a happy ever after. not being a downer but its a point in my paper. he asks us if we believe in love and you have to fight for your opinion and love is one of those things that can either ruin your life and in the end take you under or it can be a wonderful thing that may have ended but it taught you something. I didnt know that you could ever put your life on hold and give up everything just for one person to be happy. I thought you fell in love and it just was there and most likely he would leave you or cheat on you. Well guys do leave but In dating my "Noah" i saw that there really was a thing as true undieing love. not from him but from his Mom and Dad. Crazy how two people really can love each other for all eternity. It makes you want to find that person who you can do that with. I beleive that there is someone for everyone. I pray that anyways. Life sure has a funny way of showing you things.... funny how love can either make you so blissfully happy or it can crush you. It makes me want to know the ending and it drives me crazy! to bad you have to find out for yourself in Gods time. Its hard to put things in his hands like that.

Nightmares why wont you die!?!

So its like 3 a.m. and im kinda getting really really sick of the nightmares. I dont know what causes them but they are getting worse... The one thing that always made them go away well i cant do that and it sucks. I would like to just be normal and be able to sleep. I want to be healthy! I remember the days when i got to sleep... good times. wonder if they will come back or if i will just never sleep. I have read 5 books this week because it takes my mind off the scared feeling when i wake but ya know im starting to look like well like crap. Not ok with that. I would like to say to God at this moment in time that i think i have been tested to much without sleep. I need a good month of sleep. Its kind of adding to the already bigger issues. My brain is really twisted i dont know where its getting the dreams from but it needs to stop. i know things happen in the lords time but on this one i dont feel its fair. I put my biggest desire into his hands already and i have a feeling it wont be on my time so can i please have this one? Till then i guess waking up screaming and crying is in the stack.....

I really miss my Sarah

Life...Singing while showering buddies and Crap

If we take a step back and look at life its usually not something we would have planned for ourselves. I was talking to a very dear friend of mine and we were kind of complaining about life and all the crap that has been thrown at us; well as we did this, as we call "suck fest" I thought ya know Mike we have had a lot of crap I said but think about it for a moment, did it teach you something? he thought about it and said ya i guess it did. Well there you go ladies and gents! Problem solved... Not that when i get in that " I hate my life mode" i think of this but another friend of mine taught me something where you kinda take the back seat and let in the world around you for a minute and it kinda freaks you out and your grateful for the crap you have! ha ha. Its crazy how things change in the blink of an eye; I never would have thought i would be playing mommy again while my parents do whatever they feel like. Its not easy. I feel like i have to step up to the plate for both of my parents and be what they are not. I think to myself wow your 18 years old and what have you got to show for it? your family? a deeply failed relationship which your retarded about!! and a semester of college and CNA down. man that's just sad! ha ha. So Mike and I decided to put away the my life sucks card and try to be happy. Not that we are good at it.... if you know me you know im highly dramatic. One second i can be totally happy and fine then the next I am listening to Secondhand Serenade crying over things i should be used to by now... working on it... but hey that's helped with a serving of crazy which i cant help so that's my excuse. Not much in my life is normal... actually nothing is. My mom is dating when im supost to be and i cant because of two reasons but its driving me nuts! My dad is just dad and the twins well they have their days. I decided that i am going to in the summer try to go to Paris, Italy, England, and Rome with a friend who is just as crazy about the history as i am. Maybe my adventure will start there... well if i can afford it ha that's the down part of this fun part of life. I will most likely be stuck here in Utah as a CNA... eh far from the beauties of Paris and Rome. I love elderly people but come on! i got some music lessons from one of my buddies at the nursing home tho and he may just get me through the summer. He says i need to learn to sing for my man. Ha ha we sing Phantom of the Opera when we are showering him point of no return has become a fun song to sing with him! He told me that the way to a mans heart is music. He seems to think i am getting better in my duet with him. I think he is just a bad A! his voice is gorgeous! so my sad little crackle sounds bad next to him! But I don't sing to boys... its scary so well that kinda shot my chances lol I think i sang to two boys one is like my brother the other well lets say it worked for a little bit if Richard is right... hahahahahahaha I love elderly people they rock! there was this woman and she has dementia and she will ask you what the weather is every other sentence and i love her! she tells me the best stories from her childhood, the other day she told me my hands were damn cold and i need to wear her jacket and obey her haha love it! i don't know where i was going with that but uh....... i guess i should shut up this is kinda longer than i thought it would be....